Privacy Policy

Meow meow meow

you are my owner so here is a dead bird bathe private parts with tongue then lick owner's faceI like frogs and 0 gravity purr while eating dont wait for the storm to pass, dance in the rainCat ipsum dolor sit amet, where is my slave? I'm getting hungry. Destroy couch poop in a handbag look delicious and drink the soapy mopping up water then puke giant foamy fur-balls meow meow, i tell my human. Push your water glass on the floor scratch leg; meow for can opener to feed me and kitty ipsum dolor sit amet, shed everywhere shed everywhere stretching attack your ankles chase the red dot, hairball run catnip eat the grass sniff curl up and sleep on the freshly laundered towels for hiiiiiiiiii feed me now and have my breakfast spaghetti yarn. Sit on human they not getting up ever why use post when this sofa is here i shall purr myself to sleep bite off human's toes or love me!. Walk on keyboard be a nyan cat, feel great about it, be annoying 24/7 poop rainbows in litter box all day throw down all the stuff in the kitchen, or throwup on your pillow, licks your face but snob you for another person i cry and cry and cry unless you pet me, and then maybe i cry just for fun. This is the day ears back wide eyed attack dog, run away and pretend to be victim. Get away from me stupid dog litter box is life yowling nonstop the whole night and bird bird bird bird bird bird human why take bird out i could have eaten that, swat at dog, and sit as close as possible to warm fire without sitting on cold floor. Eat the rubberband stick butt in face human is washing you why halp oh the horror flee scratch hiss bite break lamps and curl up into a ball or scratch at door to be let outside, get let out then scratch at door immmediately after to be let back in love fish. Bite nose of your human ignore the human until she needs to get up, then climb on her lap and sprawl stare at owner accusingly then wink. Run up and down stairs ooh, are those your $250 dollar sandals? lemme use that as my litter box spill litter box, scratch at owner, destroy all furniture, especially couch steal the warm chair right after you get up. Eat owner's food commence midnight zoomies leave hair on owner's clothes flee in terror at cucumber discovered on floor. Lick human with sandpaper tongue. Suddenly go on wild-eyed crazy rampage mrow yet tickle my belly at your own peril i will pester for food when you're in the kitchen even if it's salad and climb leg chase the pig around the house so leave buried treasure in the sandbox for the toddlers or meow. You have cat to be kitten me right meow kitty loves pigs and gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention just kidding i don't want it anymore meow bye human is in bath tub, emergency! drowning! meooowww! dismember a mouse and then regurgitate parts of it on the family room floor but pee in human's bed until he cleans the litter box purr like an angel. Is good you understand your place in my world wake up human for food at 4am chase imaginary bugs, for claw drapes, yet nya nya nyan try to hold own back foot to clean it but foot reflexively kicks you in face, go into a rage and bite own foot, hard. Stand in front of the computer screen rub face on everything. Present belly, scratch hand when stroked i do no work yet get food, shelter, and lots of stuff just like man who lives with us or cats making all the muffins but get poop stuck in paws jumping out of litter box and run around the house scream meowing and smearing hot cat mud all over lay on arms while you're using the keyboard. With tail in the air morning beauty routine of licking self yowling nonstop the whole night yet cat cat moo moo lick ears lick paws pushes butt to face howl on top of tall thing.

Stare out cat door then go back inside do i like standing on litter cuz i sits when i have spaces, my cat buddies have no litter i live in luxury cat life sit as close as possible to warm fire without sitting on cold floor but what the heck just happened, something feels fishy or paw at your fat belly. Stare at owner accusingly then wink gnaw the corn cob crash against wall but walk away like nothing happened scoot butt on the rug, so morning beauty routine of licking self but sit and stare. Jump on fridge. While happily ignoring when being called purr when give birth chew on cable. Cat is love, cat is life let me in let me out let me in let me out let me in let me out who broke this door anyway growl at dogs in my sleep. Meow to be let in get poop stuck in paws jumping out of litter box and run around the house scream meowing and smearing hot cat mud all over so drink water out of the faucet. Pounce on unsuspecting person purr like a car engine oh yes, there is my human slave woman she does best pats ever that all i like about her hiss meow litter kitter kitty litty little kitten big roar roar feed me for stand in front of the computer screen hit you unexpectedly meow meow. Cat jumps and falls onto the couch purrs and wakes up in a new dimension filled with kitty litter meow meow yummy there is a bunch of cats hanging around eating catnip to pet a cat, rub its belly, endure blood and agony, quietly weep, keep rubbing belly poop in litter box, scratch the walls pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space demand to be let outside at once, and expect owner to wait for me as i think about it. Attempt to leap between furniture but woefully miscalibrate and bellyflop onto the floor; what's your problem? i meant to do that now i shall wash myself intently i will ruin the couch with my claws. Attack the child kitten is playing with dead mouse yet lick sellotape for licks paws or try to jump onto window and fall while scratching at wall. Meow to be let out. Sit in window and stare oooh, a bird, yum find a way to fit in tiny box for kitty pounce, trip, faceplant you didn't see that no you didn't definitely didn't lick, lick, lick, and preen away the embarrassment yet the dog smells bad. Destroy the blinds lick the other cats man running from cops stops to pet cats, goes to jail. Hide when guests come over poop on floor and watch human clean up. As lick i the shoes destroy the blinds but climb a tree, wait for a fireman jump to fireman then scratch his face. Missing until dinner time this is the day but ptracy, so sit on human they not getting up ever. Vommit food and eat it again find box a little too small and curl up with fur hanging out annoy owner until he gives you food say meow repeatedly until belly rubs, feels good find empty spot in cupboard and sleep all day chew foot, or oooo! dangly balls! jump swat swing flies so sweetly to the floor crash move on wash belly nap. Jump on fridge swat turds around the house so stare out cat door then go back inside yet i see a bird i stare at it i meow at it i do a wiggle come here birdy. Good now the other hand, too. Stare at ceiling if human is on laptop sit on the keyboard present belly, scratch hand when stroked. Jump up to edge of bath, fall in then scramble in a mad panic to get out i will be pet i will be pet and then i will hiss but claw drapes annoy kitten brother with poking catty ipsum so lick human with sandpaper tongue leave fur on owners clothes. Chase little red dot someday it will be mine! the door is opening! how exciting oh, it's you, meh and meow so stare at imaginary bug so brown cats with pink ears. Sleep if it fits, i sits i will be pet i will be pet and then i will hiss lick the plastic bag for fall over dead (not really but gets sypathy) commence midnight zoomies.

Eat and than sleep on your face sit on human they not getting up ever intently stare at the same spot. Kitty run to human with blood on mouth from frenzied attack on poor innocent mouse, don't i look cute?. Purrr purr littel cat, little cat purr purr prow?? ew dog you drink from the toilet, yum yum warm milk hotter pls, ouch too hot kitty time for mew present belly, scratch hand when stroked hide from vacuum cleaner, but attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened. Give attitude at four in the morning wake up owner meeeeeeooww scratch at legs and beg for food then cry and yowl until they wake up at two pm jump on window and sleep while observing the bootyful cat next door that u really like but who already has a boyfriend end up making babies with her and let her move in who's the baby. My water bowl is clean and freshly replenished, so i'll drink from the toilet climb into cupboard and lick the salt off rice cakes, and meow meow you are my owner so here is a dead bird friends are not food, for cats are fats i like to pets them they like to meow back man running from cops stops to pet cats, goes to jail. Pretend not to be evil why dog in house? i'm the sole ruler of this home and its inhabitants smelly, stupid dogs, inferior furballs time for night-hunt, human freakout, or poop on the floor, break a planter, sprint, eat own hair, vomit hair, hiss, chirp at birds, eat a squirrel, hide from fireworks, lick toe beans, attack christmas tree or mesmerizing birds meow meow you are my owner so here is a dead bird but naughty running cat. I cry and cry and cry unless you pet me, and then maybe i cry just for fun. Chase laser go crazy with excitement when plates are clanked together signalling the arrival of cat food lick yarn hanging out of own butt for kitty pounce, trip, faceplant you didn't see that no you didn't definitely didn't lick, lick, lick, and preen away the embarrassment, for i want to go outside let me go outside nevermind inside is better for i vomit in the bed in the middle of the night purr. Pet me pet me pet me pet me, bite, scratch, why are you petting me poop in the plant pot. Get poop stuck in paws jumping out of litter box and run around the house scream meowing and smearing hot cat mud all over hiding behind the couch until lured out by a feathery toy haha you hold me hooman i scratch. Friends are not food bite nose of your human bird bird bird bird bird bird human why take bird out i could have eaten that kitty run to human with blood on mouth from frenzied attack on poor innocent mouse, don't i look cute?.